There are no pigeons in the suburbs!

Have you ever notice there are no pigeons in the suburbs, I have lived here for approximately two weeks and I have noticed several differences between living in the city and in the suburbs. I should have known too, come to think of it about 4 years ago my nephew Patrick was at my house in Philadelphia (he has been raised in the suburbs since the age of 8 months) he was about 2 or 3. He was looking out the front door and a pigeon was walking around on the front steps and he said "Look a chicken"! At the time I thought to myself Christ, my sister has to get him out more but now I realize he had probably never seen a pigeon!

Going from city living to suburban living is like moving to a different planet, an alternate universe, if you will. According to Sarah (my youngest daughter) there are no Koch roaches at our new house (she is referring to the water bugs that run freely in the streets of Philly) but the crickets sure are loud. The sky is much darker at night here and the stars are more numerous and shine noticeably brighter, I suppose that explains the higher taxes! The first few nights I had a difficult time falling asleep it was way too quite. I lay there thinking if only a police helicopter would fly over the house illuminating the front lawn with it's search light, or maybe some obnoxious beat with way to much bass from a car parked on the corner, some random gun fire anything just so I could feel at home and sleep. For fun and excitement in the city all the neighbors would come out to watch the drug dealers in the corner house get busted, here for fun and excitement all the neighbors go to the high school football game. I guess it is sort of the same a bunch of big guys getting pushed around and manhandled.

I have met a few people here so far everyone is nice, maybe a little too nice. I am getting a bit of a Stepford vibe when I drop the kids off at school. I feel the need to bribe one of my kids to take up soccer so I can be a soccer mom too! I run at a track near the house and the sweaty men who run with me smell like clean laundry as opposed to a three day old bean burrito like the guys at the track in the city! There is something inherently wrong with that. Speaking of smells, there is always a hint of manure in the air here. Every morning like clockwork one of my girls will open the front door and say "Mom, what is that smell?" I reply with the same pad answer in a monotone voice "It's cow shit girls, now c'mon were gonna be late"!

Don't get me wrong I am happy here, my kids are adjusting very well and they are happy and safe but it is a huge adjustment that will take time for me to make. I am a city girl born and bred but I do have to wonder, if the suburbs are so great why aren't there any pigeons here?